Contributed by:
JKvarfordt@aol.com
How many of you know how to do the Laundry? First you sort your clothes--right? What
happens if you wash cranberry clothes with something white? (Show example)
Pretreat stains/choose the right temperature/put them in the washer/add soap.
Turn on the water and the washer washes them for you--right?
Then what are some ways you can dry them?
I love spring time when I can hang my clothes outside. They are fresh and smell so good,
the sun helps to eliminate germs and bacteria. Let's look at these clothes...they are all
dry! What happens if I just grab it and throw it over the rope? What about if I just hang
it here? How did it dry?
I need a volunteer. Tell me about something that bothered you this week---(dig lotion out
of purse and do nails while she talks)
Topping--oh that is nothing, you wait until you have teenagers......
Interogate--why does that bother you? How did you let that happen?
Attack---pretty trivial, it is pretty dumb to let something like that bother you!
Critisize--you are not thinking straight, it is really dumb to be aupset about that
Evade--Don't worry it will work out, do you know what I have been doing?
Advice---I think you should -----
No matter what the terminology the effect is the same:
I am not important to you
I am not being listened to
I feel bad!
We probably don't even know we are doing these things, that is why we have lessons like
this to teach us there is a better way!
______________how did you feel when I was doing these things?
Ladies---how often do you really feel listened to?
How often do you really listen?
Many problems in families and friendships are rooted in this!
Do you know how to listen?
Back to the clothes-----If I hang it carefully, I can put it right on the hanger as I take
it off the line.
Let's try this again......
Tell me about something that happened this past week.
How did you feel when you did that?
I am not sure I understand how you did that..tell me more about it
Then what happened?
___________________how did you feel the second time when I was listening better?
How much do we listen? It is something that goes on all of our lives, yet most of us have
terrible listening skills.
We listen like I hung clothes!
Hurry and get it done with!
The clothes can be re hung and fixed. Too often when we don't listen we hurt hearts! We
need to learn to listen WITH OUR HEARTS!!!
How do we show we are listening?
SHUT UP AND LISTEN!!!--stop thinking about what you are going to say!
Look at the person talking/Show Interest
Non Verbal communication
Reflect feelings
Encourage and give help when the person needs it and asks for it, but wait until you have
heard the whole thing/no advice unless the persono asks!
Don't get off on the person or problem
Must have time to do it
Do not try to interpret motives
We are going to practice listening for a few minutes:
I am going to divide into pairs
One of you share a problem.....the other block it/Trade sides and do it again
Now let's do it the right way
One of you share a problem.....the other listen/Trade sides and do it again
Conclusion:
I wish we had more time for practice, that is the most important part of this!
This lesson's purpose is to help us be more aware of listening LISTEN WITH OUR HEARTS
Finish with an example from the Savior---he learned by the things he experienced.
I think we forget this when we think of him.
He grew from grace to grace.
He had learned so well how to tune in on others that in 3 Nephi the scripture says,
"He perceived their thoughts...."
He was a had learned to forget about himself, and Listened with his heart
Quotes:
"The greatest calling we will ever have in the church will be one that we are not
officially called to. It is to listen with our hearts to our brothers and sisters in the
gospel." David O McKay
"Each [family member] must be willing to do his part to improve, since the family
unit is the basic foundation of the Church. Proper communication will always be a main
ingredient for building family solidarity and permanence" Marvin J. Ashton,
"Family Communications," New Era, Oct. 1978, p. 7).
Scriptures
D&C 108:7
7 Therefore, strengthen your brethren in all your conversation, in all your prayers, in
all your exhortations, and in all your doings.
Preparation
Rope hung in room
Tape from Library
2 chairs
Centerpiece:
Laundry Rope with clothes in a basket and clothespins
Valentine Table cloth
Picture of Jesus with little boy
Handouts:
Paper--"How to Improve Communication in the Family"
Don't hang those you love out to dry! On a cut out t-shirt
On a clothespin with a magnet write Listen with your and a heart on it--clip the t-shirt
in this. This is for the girls to take to school to remind them to Listen with your Heart!
Posters:
Quotes and ScripturesM2L8 Index
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With Our Hearts