|
Submitted by: Jolene Mortensen jolenemortensen@hotmail.com
Written by: The Young Women helped write the skit. So it is
written by the Park Avenue Ward Young Women of Logan, Utah. We did
this skit for girls' camp in 2001. We were given the theme "Be Clean" of
President Hinckley's Be's. It was lots a fun and the young women loved
it. You can change the characters to be more up to date. And it can be
used as a Roadshow or just a ward play.
Anne Robinson-
Yzma- MR. CLEAN Commercial
Pollyanna- Mr. Clean
Cruella De Vil
- Singer
Mary Poppins-
Singer
Ursula- Singer
Belle- ZEST “spiritually” clean
Commercial
Wicked Witch-
Pocahontas-
Narrator-
Alysia
THE FILTHIEST
LINK
(Contestants
are on stage)
ANNE: Welcome
to ..THE FILTHIEST LINK....a game show where 8 contestants battle each
other in trivia contest to see who is .. THE CLEANEST LINK. We will have
several rounds of rapid fire questions . Every time you get a question
right eternal blessings are added to the pot. When someone is wrong, you
all loose the blessings. Unless, someone REPENTS right before their
question is asked. The CLEANEST LINK will receive her blessing of
exaltation and a temple recommend and a MR. CLEAN of her choosing.
Let’s meet our
contestants.
Yzma, 103,
South America, evil priestess
Pollyanna, 12,
Harrington, the Glad town, the glad girl
Cruella, 40,
England, fur lover, especially Dalmatian
Mary Poppins,
30, London, nanny
Ursula, 50,
dark cavern in the sea, sea witch
Belle, 18,
primeval village, crazy inventor’s daughter
Wicked Witch of
the West, 40, OZ , witch
Pocahontas, 17,
Indian village, Indian princess & guide
ANNE: It’s time
to play... The Filthiest Link...... Yzma...In the bible, who was turned
into a pillar of salt?
Yzma: I wish it
was the emperor. Then I could be emperor!!
Anne: That is
the wrong answer...It was Lot’s wife..... Mary Poppins...what does CTR
stand for?
Mary Poppins:
Choose The Right
Anne: that is
correct.... Cruella De Vil.. What kind of people should we be friends
with?
Cruella: Anyone
that owns those Dalmatian puppies. I’ve got to have those puppies!
Anne: That is
incorrect... people who have good standards and are
worthy.....Pollyanna...the scriptures tell us that our bodies are what?
Pollyanna:
Temples
Anne: That is
correct.... Ursula..what kind of language are we supposed to use?
Ursula: Body
Language.. Don’t underestimate the power of Body Language. (Ham it up!)
Anne: Once
again, that is the WRONG answer. We should use clean and kind language,
not vulgar and impure......What is wrong with some of you- You are
several fries short of a Happy Meal....... Belle...why should we not
take the Lord’s name in vain?
Belle: Yes,
I’ve read the book a thousand times. In the bible. It is a commandment.
Anne:
Exactly... Wicked Witch....What is important about turning eight?
Wicked Witch:
That’s when you get your first flying monkey.
Anne: Who let
these characters in?? That is definitely wrong.. It’s the age of
accountability, you are baptized.... Pocahontas.....How many lepers came
back to thank Jesus after he healed them?
Pocahontas:
One.
Anne:
correct....Yzma...what fluffy animal is the most mentioned animal in the
bible?
Yzma: a llama
Anne:
INCORRECT!! It’s a sheep. Pollyanna....What age can you begin dating?
Pollyanna: 16
Anne:
correct.....Cruella, what should you wear at least mid-length on your
thigh or longer?
Cruella: a
Dalmatian fur coat!
Anne: incorrect
as usual Cruella......shorts.....Mary Poppins ..who is the prophet
today?
Mary Poppins:
Gordon B. Hinckley
Anne:
correct... Ursula..name the prophet who was swallowed by a big fish
because of disobedience.
Ursula: I
always hoped King Triton would get swallowed by a big fish.
Anne:
incorrect!!.. Jonah..........Belle.. How are we cleansed when we sin?
Belle:
Repentance and never do it again
Anne:
correct....Wicked Witch, the prophet says not to watch what?
Wicked Witch:
Pokemon
Anne:
Incorrect!!...Rated R shows or anything else that is unwholesome.
Anne: Time is
up in round one. . Due to the lack of time we will vote off two
filthiest links.
(Contestants
write two names on their cards, during this time the narrator is
speaking.)
Narrator: We
had four in this round who did not answer one question correctly. Four
answered all their questions correctly. We will see what happens.)
Anne: Yzma.
Yzma: Pollyanna
and Belle
Anne:
Pollyanna.
Pollyanna: Yzma
and Ursula
Anne: Cruella
Cruella: Belle
and Pollyanna
Anne: Mary
Poppins
Mary Poppins:
Ursula and Wicked Witch
Anne:Ursula
Ursula: Belle
and Mary Poppins
Anne: Belle
Belle: Ursula and Yzma
Anne: Wicked
Witch
Wicked Witch:
Belle and Pocahontas
Anne:
Pocahontas
Pocahontas:
Ursula and Wicked Witch
Anne: Ursula
and Belle- You are out. Good bye!
Ursula:
(yelling as she goes off stage) You pitiful, insignificant fools!!!!
Belle: You are
positively primeval! Bon jour! Good day! (Belle walks off with a book in
hand- reading it)
Narrator: We
will now take a commercial break and hear from Mr. Clean.
Commercial:
(Mr. Clean
mopping floor)
Singers singing
in background:
Anne: Welcome
back to the Filthiest Link. Let’s begin. We will begin with the one who
has answered the most questions correctly. Due to a tie between
Pollyanna and Mary Poppins we had a coin toss. Mary Poppins won and will
begin.... Mary Poppins..The prophet says we should wear only one pair of
these at a time.
Mary Poppins:
earrings
Anne:
correct...Wicked Witch.. The prophet also promises that there will come
a time that you’ll regret having one of these if you have one, because
they are hard to get rid of and they will embarrass you later. What is
he talking about?
Wicked Witch: a
dog, like Toto, they poop all over and bite me!
Anne:
wrong!!... a tattoo!!...Pocahontas..finish this song title ‘I Hope They
....
Pocahontas:
call me on a mission
Anne:
correct...Yzma.. Finish this scripture.. “Seek ye first the kingdom
of......”
Yzma: Kuzco
Anne: wrong!
....heaven....Pollyanna..who was the first latter day prophet?
Pollyanna:
Joseph Smith
Anne:
correct...Cruella..The field is (What), already to harvest.
Cruella: polka
dotted with Dalmatians
Anne: wrong!!!.
The field is WHITE!!... Mary Poppins...If we keep the Word of Wisdom we
are promised that we will be able to run and not be.......
Mary Poppins:
weary
Anne:
correct......Wicked Witch..Name the prophet that wicked King Noah had
burned at the stake.
Wicked Witch:
It should be Dorothy> I want those Ruby Slippers!
Anne: that is
incorrect!!....Abinadi.......Pocahontas.. Finish this song line. Book of
Mormon stories that my teacher tells to me, Are about the .......
Pocahontas:
Lamanites
Anne:
correct....Yzma...a c word for Moroni’s rank when he wrote the title of
liberty.
Yzma: CUTE!!
Much cuter than Kronk and smarter!
Anne:
wrong.....Captain...Time is up. Time to vote for two more. Who isn’t
pulling their weight? Is there a village out there who is missing their
idiot?
Narrator: The
filthiest Link in that round was Yzma and the Cleanest Link was a triple
tie- Pollyanna, Mary Poppins, and Pocahontas.
Anne: It’s time
to see who you voted for. Yzma.
Yzma: Pollyanna
and Pocahontas
Pollyanna: Yzma
and Wicked Witch
Cruella: Mary
Poppins and Pocahontas
Mary Poppins:
Cruella and Wicked Witch
Wicked Witch:
Mary Poppins and Pocahontas
Pocahontas:
Yzma and Wicked Witch
Anne:
Pocahontas and Wicked Witch you are the filthiest links. Toss them out
with our dirty dish water. Good-bye!
Wicked Witch:
I’ll get you my pretty!!! You cursed little brat!! (Pocahontas tosses
water on her) I’m melting, melting!!! Who would have thought a beautiful
little girl like you would destroy my wickedness!
Anne: We are
down to four contestants.... Mary Poppins....finish this phrase, a
spoonful of sugar helps the .....
Mary Poppins:
medicine go down...In the most delightful way.
Anne:
correct...Yzma...finish this phrase..You are....
Yzma: fired,
you are being let go, your department is being down sized, you’re part
of an outplacement, we are going in different directions, we’re not
picking up your option.
Anne: wrong..
You are my sunshine..Pollyanna..finish this song title.. You can make
the......
Pollyanna:
pathway bright!!!
Anne:
correct...Cruella...What did Jesus tell the lepers to do to become
clean?
Cruella: Drown
them, bash them in the head! I don’t care what they do to the little
beasts!
Anne:
incorrect...He told them to go show themselves to the priest...Mary
Poppins..the first article of faith says We Believe in God the Eternal
Father, and in his son Jesus Christ, and in what.
Mary Poppins:
the Holy Ghost
Anne:
correct......Yzma..For every choice, there is a what...
Yzma: potion
Anne:
wrong.....consequence....Pollyanna..At the time of Noah what did the
Lord do to cleanse the earth?
Pollyanna: He
flooded it.
Anne:
correct..Cruella..Name the three degrees of Glory
Cruella: I
think she worked for me, A bachelor’s degree in ____, a master’s degree
in clothing, and a P.H.D. in fur coat fashion design.
Anne:
incorrect, again Miss Captain of Incompetence..telestial, terrestrial,
and celestial..........Mary Poppins..oops. Our time is up. Time to vote
off two more. Who is slower than a snail with a limp? Who has begun to
look dangerously dim.
Narrator: In
this round, Cruella and Yzma have not answered any question correctly.
In fact, this whole game they haven’t. They are the filthiest links.
Pollyanna is
our Cleanest Link. She has answered the most correct
questions.
Now for another
commercial break.
ZEST fully
clean, Zest fully clean, You’re not fully clean unless you’re ZEST fully
CLEAN!!!
Anne: We are
back. Let’s see who is seriously the runt of the litter. Whose brain has
already gone home and should follow it?
Yzma: Cruella and Pollyanna
Pollyanna: Cruella and Yzma
Cruella: Yzma
and Mary Poppins
Mary Poppins:
Cruella and Yzma (Cruella’s looking at her with mouth agape) Close your
mouth, we are not a codfish. Cheeky!
Anne: Yzma and
Cruella. You are THE FILTHIEST LINKS!! Good-bye!
Yzma: I wish I
could turn you all into llamas!!
Cruella: You’re MONGRELS! You’re ALL
MONGRELS!! But I’m not beaten yet. You’ve won the battle ,but I’m going
to win the wardrobe!!
Anne: We are at our final round and
we will have only one winner. Remember our winner, The Cleanest Link,
will receive eternal blessings, a temple recommend for being worthy, and
a Mr. Clean of her choice.
Due to our
time, we will do a final rapid fire round and whoever misses is OUT!
Pollyanna and
Mary Poppins I will ask one question and you will each give one response
until one of you can no longer respond. Pollyanna ..The question is the
prophet mentions some other things we should stay away from. Name one.
Pollyanna:
drugs.
Anne:
correct...Mary Poppins.. Can you name one?
Mary Poppins:
vulgar concerts.
Anne:
correct.....Pollyanna ....
Pollyanna:
pornography
Anne:
correct.....Mary Poppins.
Mary Poppins:
sex
Anne:
correct... Pollyanna
Pollyanna: body
piercing
Anne: correct..
Mary Poppins
Mary Poppins:
movies and tv shows with immorality and bad language
Anne:
correct...Pollyanna
Pollyanna:
immodest dress
Anne: correct..
Mary Poppins
Mary Poppins:
oh, supercalifragilisticexbealidoshus
Anne: you are
out. Good-bye....Pollyanna.. has become our Cleanest Link. Her rewards
are great because as a young woman she has followed the counsel of our
prophet, Gordon B. Hinckley. She has kept herself clean and worthy. Here
is your eternal blessings and temple recommend and your Mr. Clean. (Mr.
Clean comes out and stands by her)
6 Be's
Roadshows
Home |
